Talking to children about divorce can help them adjust to the new situation which develops once the process is complete.
When parents are going through a divorce or ending their relationship with the co-parent, it is a very difficult time for everyone involved, including the children. The parents sometimes fail to realize that children need attention during this process as well, because they confused and unsure about the future, too.
In many child custody cases in Texas, the parents will fight over who gets primary custody. The court analyzes these cases based upon the best interests of the child factors. These require judges to make decisions based on factors present in the relationship. The final determination by the courts should be what it feels will best benefit the child, and it is not intended as a punishment to one side or the other.
This puts the courts in a difficult position, because their rulings are extremely difficult to change once entered. The parents argue, and the child internalizes his or her feelings because of the parents’ disagreements. If the child does not understand what happens in the custody phase of the divorce, they may feel that one of their parents will abandon them at this time.
It is extremely important that you and your spouse make sure to talk to your children about divorce before you file. They will have a lot of questions about what this means for their future, and they are looking to you for assurances that you will both remain involved in the lives of the children.
These conversations should be sure to focus on the emotions of the child. You and your co-parent should not use these discussions as an opportunity to argue in front of the kids. Keep the conversation centered on the questions you are asked. Do not blame one another for the ending of the relationship.
Children need to know that both parents love them and will be there for them at all times. While one parent may be the primary caretaker, both will be active participants in the lives of the children.
If you are thinking of getting a divorce or ending your relationship, you need to be sure that you protect the time that you have with your children. Those who fail to understand the significance of their decisions at this time often find themselves unable to make changes to the custody agreements that they put in place.
To learn more about your specific situation, you should speak to an experienced family law attorney. Your attorney will be able to describe the custody process to you, and provide knowledgeable guidance to help you and your spouse find an agreement that is in the best interests of the children.